Highs and Lows from a Rainy Monday

(Disclaimer: I am aware that the weather may not have been rainy where you were yesterday. I hear my LA friends were a teeny bit warm, and my Charleston peeps were about to drown at the intersection of Calhoun and Rutledge. The "rainy Monday" in the title of this blog only refers to the weather in New York City, and more specifically, the Upper West Side. No disrespect to those of you who did not have a steady, calming rain yesterday.)

The daily schedule of an actor widely varies from day to day. Last week, for example, I had several days chock-full of auditions, callbacks, rehearsals, and actor-themed errands. Days that began with the following conversation:

Me: (sternly) I absolutely cannot do any extra errands today.

Dean: (drinking coffee) OK.

Me: (defensively) I mean it. I don't have the time.

Dean: (not looking up from the paper) OK.

Me: (on the brink of a freak out) So, don't even ask.

Dean: (yawning) Were you saying something?

Yesterday, I had an audition later in the day, so I got to spend the day doing other stuff. First, I made another trip to Kinko's to copy scripts for Dean. (Shout out to Dean Poynor- he's had lots of really good theatres request scripts lately.) Finally, the people at Kinko's understand that we are married, and that while the scripts are copyrighted, it is OKAY for me to copy them. I had to forward them an email from Dean that began, "Hey Baby...could you please copy the attached script for me," to prove I was legit. Of course, now Renaldo seems super attentive when I go in, but I'm afraid clearing things up would affect the level of service I now enjoy.

Dean is the cook in our house, but he's been working late recently, so I made dinner last night. I did. I found a crock pot recipe, made a list, and went to the Trader Joe's for supplies. (While I love Trader Joe's, it's just not the same without Two Buck Chuck- grocery stores here can't sell wine, and it makes me wonder why I went an extra block out of my way to shop there. Maybe for the frozen rice.) So, I made this healthy, chicken stew-y thing, and it was very...healthy. So healthy, in fact, it prompted Dean to say, "With all these good ingredients, I wonder why it's not tastier." This was not a slam, but a shared confusion. Why wasn't it tastier? I followed the directions. OK, I added some extra veggies, but I mostly followed the directions. I take it as a sign that I should practice drinking wine and looking cute while Dean cooks for us. We already know I'm good at that.

On the way home from the store, a guy was walking ahead of me with a bouquet of roses. He was carrying them pointing down, so as he walked, rose petals would occasionally fall onto the sidewalk for me to walk on as I followed behind him. It was pretty sweet for him to do that for a total stranger. It made the walk home from the store much more regal.

Today, I'm going to take some time to get to know the new program I bought to organize my mailing lists. It's called Bento, like the lunch box from Japanese restaurants. Then, it's off to an audition I've been called in for, so I'll get those sides prepared, too. I'm working from home today!

It's almost lunch time, and last night's leftovers are calling me. But I might ignore them, because Japanese food is calling just a tiny bit louder.

Auditions are...(fill in the blank)

Today I went to two auditions. WENT to.

In the first play, I was auditioning for the role of a woman in her mid-30's who is going through a gender identity crisis. This role required some tasteful rear end nudity, and the character sings an a capella song at the end of the play, likely about her transformation. If you know me, you know I love two things: baring my rear end and singing in front of people. If you don't know me, then that doesn't seem funny to you at all.

The second audition was for a show based on a book with somewhere in the neighborhood of 60 characters, but the play has only 5 actors. I was reading for the role of Gertrude Bell, Aunt Mumma, and about a dozen more. The director not only wanted actors to come in with a 90 second monologue, but also (get this) a scene in which the auditioning actor would portray BOTH roles. Memorized. You know, to show range. Because playing Lady Macbeth, Juanita from Sordid Lives and Fudge in Tales of a Fourth Grade Nothing means I'm kinda a one-note actor.

You may be wondering how these auditions went. "If I know Monica, she really shone in that gender-bending role- she loves a nice pair of slacks." Or maybe, "Monica has always reminded me of extraordinary British diplomat and spy, Gertrude Bell." If only...

As it turned out, both shows are knee-deep in rehearsals while we are in Australia, so the stage managers sent me on my way with a "thank you anyway" and audible sighs.

Still, I feel pretty good about today. My hair did exactly what it was supposed to do, and Hank said my monologue was very effective, even though it made no mention of dogs. I took the train in the correct direction to the appropriate stops. I finished reading Wonder of the World and plan on using something from it for a new comedic audition piece. And for a late-afternoon treat, Dean and I are going to a taping of David Letterman's show.

Tomorrow morning, I will go to the Actors' Equity Audition Center to sit and wait for the chance to audition for the new Playwrights Horizons show. Maybe I'll wear a nice pair of slacks...