Tuesday, October 26, 2010

Stuff you hear in NYC

Living in NYC, you hear lots of things on the street (or in the park, or in the stores.) We are a city of walkers, and we are privy to other people's arguments, cell phone conversations, lunch orders, and random mutterings.

Sometimes, the things I hear are really funny.

This morning, for example, one of those Upper West Side Moms really had her hands full. She was walking a giant dog, and pushing a stroller with a toddler and an infant in it. The baby was crying, and the dog was pulling, and the toddler wanted the baby toy, so the mom says to the toddler, "HERE! Play with this hat!" The toddler said, "But I want a toyyyyy." And the mom said, "Play with the HAT! Hats are fun!" Poor kid- hats aren't fun. Mittens are fun.

Sometimes we hear noises, not voices.

Friday was garbage day, and our street is one-way. You do the math: Sometimes people in cars will get stuck behind the truck. And sometimes that can be frustrating. There are "No Honking" signs all over the block, so when some idiot decided to lean on his horn for several minutes without a break, it was cause for a hand full of neighbors to stream out of our apartments and into the street. We located the offending car and the still-honking driver, and knocked on his window, throwing our arms in the air, yelling at him to stop. "People LIVE HERE," we hollered. (Our street is tree-lined and residential, not the type of busy New York Street accustomed to honking.) It was a scene right out of a movie, and if the fella had honked for another 20 seconds, my very verbal neighbor was going to get out the crowbar and smash in his windshield. It was SOO New York.

Sometimes the things we hear are troubling.

Walking Hank in the park the other day, a big burly guy with a backpack approached us on a path. As he neared, I heard him say what sounded like, "Eating people is a good way to share, especially for gays and faggots." He then perched on a bench near a sleeping homeless person, and continued his rant. I was worried for the sleeping person, and saw the same concern on the faces of other dog walkers who passed by. I felt like I was going to witness one of those crimes that begins episodes of "Law and Order." It was pretty busy in the park, so I hope things turned out alright.

Yes, we hear lots of things here. Subway musicians, dogs in the park, sirens, different languages, babies laughing, car horns, feet hitting the pavement, boom boxes, rain, wind, and leaves falling.

And it is wonderful.

1 comment:

  1. If only the Law and Order Mother Ship were still filming, you are right, that scene on the park bench would be a winner. Maybe you could play the character based on yourself! Over the years, I found that the two shmucks who find the body in the opening of L&O are often the most entertaining part of the entire epidode.